Sunday, February 26, 2012

Going It On My Own



So the day has come where this little sarcastic birdie has to jump nest and try to make it on her own. Yes, you heard it here second (actually third as I mentioned it both on my Facebook page and Twitter account), I have my own domain. It gives a girl a definite false sense of superiority. Think about it, I'm in charge of my own domain. Cue evil laughter: Bwahahahaha

Anyway, I have been debating this for a while. I have been resisting as I was afraid I'd lose followers, get way too confused with a new system (Mr. Rant is the evil computer genius in our house, not me), and was reluctant to make this big of a commitment. Amazingly this married Mother of 2 suffers from a bit of internet commitment phobia. That or it is an innate fear of failure. Sadly my BA in Psychology doesn't make me qualified enough to differentiate.

It is time to switch that bookmark to the new page: www.rachelsrantings.com. 

I will be posting only on the Rachel's Rantings in Rio site now. Please come with patience as I am just figuring this out. 

So please go check it out and tell me what you think! 

Friday, February 24, 2012

Hot Brazilians for your Friday!

I am doubling up the hotness this Friday with not one but two pictures of each of the hotties. Be prepared!


I couldn't help but share the view of both sides of Lavínia Vlasak. Seriously, it's enough to make a girl wonder about switching teams (though I doubt I'd have a chance in hell). 



Lucas Gil, "Hello. Is it me you're looking for? I can see it in your eyes..."


The Latin Man


I'm going to start by saying that Mr. Rant is a very involved Father and Husband. He plays with the kids, helps with the kiddo responsibilities, and even does stuff around the house.

That being said, he is still very much a Latin Man.

What do I mean by that? Well, let me explain. You see, this weekend we took a Latin woman friend and her kids out to the country with us. At one point I was annoyed with Mr Rant, which is not uncommon while staying at his Mother's place, when my friend pointed out that I married a Latin Man.

Alright, I'm seeing that I didn't clear anything up there. My point, Latin men are incredibly spoiled by their female family members.

Take Mr. Rant at his Mother's house. The kind of lazy that takes him over is mind boggling. It is as if he forgets that he has children to take care of. Actually, it's more like his Mother expects him to relax and let her and I take care of them.

The problem here is that I am not a Latin woman. That is not going to fly in that if you don't get off your ass and remember that I am not the only one capable of serving juice to small ones your ass is going to go flying right out that window over there.

It is just amazing how time turns back and my husband and his brother become 15 upon crossing the threshold. Sure Mr Rant does play with the kids and, at this point in our marriage, is pretty good at remembering that he is married with children even though he is at his Mother's place. Although there is still a sense of entitlement towards pampering.

Take this weekend. Mr Rant sprained his ankle while snowboarding and thus couldn't go on the hike to the waterfall with the group. He stayed back home and napped with my friend's baby, and took care of the little guy when he woke up. I will say, Mr Rant knows his way around babies.

Anyway, upon our  return and after eating lunch, Mr. Rant declared that he needed a nap... Let me rephrase that, another nap. I laughed. He had to be kidding. I had done everything at that point with our kids and he needed ANOTHER nap?! 15 minutes later I couldn't find him. Low and behold he was napping in his Mother's bed with Mommy.

While I get that we were at my MIL and he did have that life threatening sprained ankle, enough is really enough. I am calling for equal opportunity spoiling! Momma needs a nap!

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Carnaval Dildo?!

Every single person who has watched the big Rio de Janeiro Carnaval parade has wondered about how the tapa-sexos (Cache-sexo in English) stay on. 

Know what a tapa-sexo is? It's this:


Yeah, not much to that bad boy. And see those muscular legs? This woman is about to samba for 90 minutes (or more) and make that little piece of tapa-sexo hold on for dear life to whatever landing strip fits under a costume like that. 

So how do they stay on? This is the question of the day! Mr. Rant said he saw some forward that explained it all. We found the picture:


Yes, this is exactly what you think. Apparently someone is trying to convince the world that the tapa-sexos have a thumb that sticks up the vagina and holds that bad boy on. This only shows how little  men knows about the vagina. I'm sorry guys, not even Wonder Woman's Vag would be able to clench onto this little guy for an hour and a half of samba. Hell, I doubt she's make on a 2 block walk to the grocery store. 


Seeing that the dildo inspired tapa-sexo only exists in this shell version, I'm thinking it's one man's dream to see an image of his thumb somewhere where no one will allow it. 

I find it much easier to believe that they are glued on, only to be painfully ripped off later. Kind of like this:


Now I realize that there is a version that is made out of metal that is made to size and squeezed on for dear life:


But if you would please refer to the first photo of this post and look at the butt. There is nothing back there. That would have to be one skinny and uncomfortable metal stick suffocating between those cheeks. 

So what is it? Thumb, glue, suffocating, or none of the above?
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